NBA please work on Accessibility!

I’m hoping this article reaches some goodness in someones heart and a change is made because of it. Being totally blind and relying on a screen reader can sometimes be frustrating. The reason for the frustration is because I can get 80% or 90% to completing my goal and then hit a roadblock. I’m going to describe to you the frustration length at which I’ve been dealing with the NBA. I’ve reached out to them on Twitter several times and have gotten no response basically getting ignored. I’m deciding to take the next step and hope fully some media gets involved which will help out everyone who is blind or has possibly other disabilities or some dinosaur who just wants to listen to the radio broadcast LOL!

The NBA season start it up a few weeks ago I paid my $10 for the NBA audio pass, because that’s all I need. If you ever want to know what frustration feels like just watch the television broadcast close your eyes and try to figure out what the hell is happening. I like to know who has the ball possibly where people are positioned and to learn about possibly plays teams are running. You simply cannot do this watching the game on television. The first thing I did was install the NBA app on my iPhone. This actually went well. I will spend the least amount of time on this particular part, because it worked well. No sun will say joe you have a working solution so why continue to complain? That’s a valid question, one that I will answer with just this answer because I should be allowed to access this on anything I want to. On a particular day I may use my iPad or my Mac to also access applications and websites.

Let’s start with a Mac. I live in Kentucky so the Pacers grizzlies and probably five other teams are blacked out for me. I decided to watch a Pacers game it told me I was blacked out and gave me the option to listen which everything went well. The next day I wanted to listen to the Boston Celtics play someone. So I clicked on the game and there was no listen option. It only gave me options for the television broadcast. I tried everything to get this to work and could not. Even though last year I listen to games online through my Mac just fine! I then found a page that says games. I selected it saw the Celtics game selected that. I then saw a listen button in my heart jumped a little! I finally was nearing the point of success or so I thought. When clicking the listen button nothing appears to happen. I did a search for a way because that’s how I listen to the Pacers game the night before. It sees away however it’s a way for the television broadcast.

When digging around on Google I found the following about NBA audio pass. You can listen on your iPhone iPad and Alexa. Nothing about the computer. Which is I’m sorry just stupid.

Let’s move to Alexa when trying to actually get the skill to open I get this radio voice telling me exciting features are coming this fall the season is now two weeks old and I’ve paid my money yet I can’t access the thing I paid for. Look I understand Covid is going on but at least be honest with me and let me know what is happening. A simple response on Twitter joe I hear you were working on it would’ve sufficed! Furthermore NBA I would be glad to assist with Web testing if you need me to! I do it for a living but would charge you nothing because I just want to enjoy the product that I cannot at this moment.

IPad you would think it would be like the iPhone and just work however that is not the case. The iPad of course has a larger screen therefore more crap gets in the way and I cannot find the listen button or the radio feed information!

Please NBA I’m begging you I just want to listen to the games and enjoy them. Let me clarify as well I’d like to enjoy them on any device that I have easily and accessibly! It’s a real bummer because last year on every device I had things just worked however that’s not the case this year!

Hopefully 2021 fixes this issue and I can enjoy myself once again with the NBA in the games of my choosing! I thought about picking up another SiriusXM radio for NBA, but $21 a month just to enjoy something I already paid $10 for just isn’t worth it.

Review of several Noise Canceling Headphones

A lot of you may ask why are you doing this? This is a fair question. My search for quality Noise Canceling headphones started out innocent enough, but has consumed me in a good way., I thought I would share my findings with you to help you make a good choice when buying a headphone.

I am totally blind a point at first I was going to leave out, however the more I reviewed headphones the more I think it could explain why I care so much. A few months ago I was playing around with the Master & Dynamic MW65 and the Dragon Fly Cobalt. I was listening to a song by Cam and I heard the drum hit and it sounded so lifelike it emotionally connected with me. From that moment I set out to find the best portable option. For me hearing new things on a track I’ve heard hundreds of times is such a cool experience. For me hearing is my seeing so the more detail I get the more likely I am going to like the headphone. Some of you may not want that much detail, so I will let you know on each headphone how it sounds to me and who I think it would be good for.

•One thing to note is I don’t think there is a perfect headphone that checks all of my boxes. When buying a tip for you is decide what is most important to you. Is it sound? Is it comfort? Maybe it is noise canceling? Once you have the top 3 ideas in your mind that will help.

Sony WHxm3

These are revered as the top of the line headphone by most reviewers. I am not going to be one of those reviewers. Look if you have never owned a headphone that costs more than $20 you honestly will love these things. Lets get in to it.

comfort and Sound

These are some of the lightest headphones, because they are plastic. They are light and fairly comfortable. However after an hour of using my ears get warm and sweaty. My ears just also brushes the driver causing me a little annoyance. This will not be the case for everyone depending on your head size. They do have an app and have voice prompts that let you know when you’ve changed modes, connected, and battery level. They also offer Alexa support however when doing so you lose the ability to change modes on the fly which I missed when using them to travel. For example being blind I didn’t always want noise canceling on, but if I chose Alexa then I have to use the app to change settings.

Sound at first was really good to me. I can actually hear some separation of instruments on a track something before this on bluetooth was really not a thing. My only problem is the bass is just bloated The argument people will make is there is an EQ in the app. Yes I’ve messed with it, but when doing so other details become less prominent. I just found myself not being a big fan of the Sony sound no matter how I tried customizing it.

recommendations and final thoughts

If noise canceling is your number 1 priority buy these. If sound then noise canceling I’d say if your a bass fan give them a try otherwise lets continue to the next headphone. These are also dropping in price do to the XM4 coming, so if your a bargain hunter you may find a good deal on these.

Bowers & Wilkins PX7

I wanted to love these things. Confession time I have bought them 3 different times forgetting the bad things about them. If they would fix a few flaws to me these may be my end game.

comfort and Sound

These are actually pretty heavy. If you compare them to the Sony’s your going to feel a difference. They weigh in at 310G but the carbon fiber makes them feel heavy to me. I can ware them for an hour or so but eventually have a headache. The noise canceling was good in these I am ranking them third overall, but occasionally I would hear a popping noise on the right side. This happened in every unit I had. Reading on forums it was believed to be when the noise canceling would change automatically, but I left mine on high and would hear it randomly. These also have to be on to play audio so if the battery ever gives out on you can no longer use them.

The good here is the sound stage is so big. It’s amazing to me. I could actually follow someone playing guitar and keep with them the entire track. If your mainly in to Electronic or Rap and some rock these headphones will be a great fit for you.

For me on pop and country tracks the mid range was muffled. Certain instruments sounded like they had a towel over them. Highs were also a bit high and could be fatiguing. The microphone left a lot to be desired also.

Final thoughts

As I have stated these are a nice headphone but for a certain profile. I like that they also allow for USBC playback. This means you can plug them in to your computer and use them as a sound-card. This gives you usually a better DAC. They also charge when doing that which helps since you need the battery to use these thats a good thing. I have high hopes for a PX8 but please fix the mids on these.

Master & Dynamic MW65

These were my top pick for a long time. I love the clarity and separation you can get with these. These were the first premium bluetooth Headphone I had heard.

Comfort and Sound

These are so beautiful. I love the leather and just the overall lightness. That being said the Ear-cups are smaller on these than they were on the MW60 for example making them less comfortable. The noise canceling has a bit of a hiss where your hearing white noise. When you start playing music it does get covered up. These also had one big fault that I saw. If riding in a bus, laying on your stomach, or just touching them on your head you’d hear feedback. This is the only pair I have that has this issue to an annoying amount. Its not wind noise its more you’re hearing the pads move if that makes sense.

Sound is good, but volume is an issue on these. I do love the simplicity of these. They don’t have an app, and they are just plug and play. Apps really can suck and the more I have Bluetooth headphones I’m not sure updates are always a positive thing. The louder they got the more shrill the highs become making my ears become fatigued quickly. I loved what I heard with these, but I never could really jam out. I also wish the lows were a bit more punchy.

Final thoughts

I would recomend these more for an Audio file person. The hissing may annoy you, but think you will enjoy the overall sound profile. They aren’t the flattest sound signature I’ve heard, but I enjoyed it if you can get a volume you like. Using them with a dac, but I am not really wanting to go that route with these reviews.

Shure AONIC 50

I recently got the Shure’s as a review unit. I then bought myself them as a gift. These are so musical. Now let me say these are not for everyone. They don’t compete with Sony or Bose in noise canceling, but they are the best musical bluetooth headphone I’ve heard. They have some downsides so lets get in to it.

Comfort and Sound

They are pretty heavy overall, however they feel super comfortable to me. I have a friend of mine who has a bit bigger head, and they bug him. They are not big head approved as some reviewers say. I did have some sweat build up but less than what I have with the Sony’s. The headband has a thick padding on it so it never digs in.

Sound is superb. I feel these don’t over exaggerate anything. I feel for songs that are meant to have bass they have it. For songs that were recorded not to they don’t. I do find some pop music in particular to be a bit shrill with these, but for anything else I love them. I really enjoy the soundstage with these. Listening to Foggy day by Sinatra you can hear an amazing amount of space between instruments.

Final thoughts

These are my favorites in that they deliver what I want. I don’t think I would travel with them, because the case they have is so huge. I could pack my lunch in it. That being said to use around my house they block out most noises efficiently. If I were on airplanes or trains more I would choose something else.

Bose 700

I am using these as I type now. I have had them a year and honestly they piss me off more than I am happy with them. The software has been buggy the entire cycle I’ve had them and for $400 I just expect more. I do like there sound and the fact they have no pressure at max noise canceling is why I keep them. I can also use them for 8 hours a day with no issues.

Comfort and Sound

When I first got them they were super uncomfortable it took about a month until they felt great. I still think the QC line from Bose was so much better for comfort. I do like that the pressure is gone on max on the 700s . This is something most noise canceling headphones can’t say.

Music sounds fairly good. Nothing stands out to me they do a decent job on reproducing music. I view these as I just want to block out as much as I want, but still listen to a game or podcast. I like that they added a equalizer a year after promising, but it is only a three band equalizer so it can lack in fine tuning. Again I think equalizers are over rated, but if you like playing with such a thing be warned this is pretty limited. That being said the Bose 700 aren’t going to blow you away with sound, but they ‘ll do the job. What really stands out on these headphones over anything else on the market is the microphone. It is awesome. On the headset during a call you can press the Alexa button and it will mute the microphone this works on Zoom and Teams also.

Final thoughts

I do like these headphones overall. I just am disappointed in them for some reason. I feel like they are the best in noise canceling yet they don’t satisfy me the way I would like them to. I have noticed the battery lose a lot of charge for a years use. When I first got them they were at 20 hours now full charge I am at 15 hours. This is a pretty significant drop in battery percentage. If your looking for a great microphone experience first look no where else but these. If you want great sound maybe look at another headphone.

Sennheiser Momentum 3

These were close to the Shure for my top headphone. I think these noise cancel well. Remember how I said uptakes ruin things that doesn’t apply here. In fact Sennheiser has improved noise canceling over time. In fact these are close to the Sony’s in some respect. I think Sony still wins on the high end, but for planes, trains, and etc. they should be more than adequate.

Comfort and Sound

These are a premium headphone! The build is outstanding! From the real leather earned to the frame of the headphone nothing screams cheap. I love the leather you find on these vs the fake leather on every other headphone I’ve listed except the M&D. I find I have so much room in these and I really don’t sweat in them.

The bass is something I’ve never really heard before on headphones. You feel it. Its not out of control like the Sony’s, but super clean. For movies it is amazing and may be the best headphone I’ve ever used for that. Sometimes though I find myself wanting to take a break from the bass. It can be a bit much some days. Overall though these have great sound throughout the frequency responses!

One thing I wanted to touch on. For blind users for some reason when using the phone after you hang up Voiceover stops working and you have to toggle it off and on again. Sennheiser really changes the sound profile on these when taking a call you get like an echo chamber sound. The other headphones do something similar in dropping in sound because of the Bluetooth profile changes it takes to activate a microphone but the Sennheiser takes it to an extreme in my point of view. Folks always comment they struggle to hear me on these and I have tried 3 or 4 different units so I know it is just not one headphone.

Final thoughts

These are my second favorite headphones, and depending on my mood I sometimes take these over the Shure. I would say they do play every type of music great. I think Audio File lovers would prefer the Shure do to the wider sound stage and separation, but others won’t care. In fact I would say the Momentums are going to be appreciated by more of the masses for the exciting bass profile.

thanks for Reading

This was a lot of fun to put together. It was a lot of work at times to go back and edit things from my thoughts. I walk away with this final thought. Bluetooth is no longer a joke for headphones. I think it still has it’s challenges, but at the end of the day I am not going to wire myself in anymore. I can’t wait for the next generation. The Sony WH-XM4 were just released and Sony has put in some flashier tech. However that being said most of you if you want great noise canceling grab the XM3 on the cheap when they get marked down.

I’m sorry Matt Jones, Boxing, and god I am getting crazy

The only reason I am awake is because I woke up to use the bathroom stumbled upon an article that will bring the chime back on new Mac computers on start up and had to try and confirm. It works. Go to the terminal type in sudo nvram StartupMute=%00 

That’s it you now have the old lovely Mac start up sound. I know I have problems, but this makes a difference for me knowing when I should hold options for if I wanted to launch bootcamp or something. Alright moving on.

 

Saturday night I watched boxing on the radio. I guess that would or should be listened. Thank you TalkSport for broadcasting. Boxing on the radio has taught me so much about the sport I otherwise wouldn’t get. I did hear Wilder connect with one of his bombs god damn sounded like it would have killed me. I am excited to hear more so keep up the great work TalkSport.

 

I had a moment on Twitter the other night I am a bit embarrassed about. Matt Jones who is a radio host who I have grown to love and respect his show a lot, and really is one of the reasons I love the Cats. I have tuned out more in the last few months, because honestly I hate politics in sports. I stopped watching the NFL during the protests because you can’t escape it I watch those sports to not care or escape from the every day world not to see what an adult who is a millionaire playing a kids game thinks. I digress. Anyway Matt tweeted and I said if I wanted that kind of news I can get the same thing from following MSNBC unfollowing. I am not a Trump supporter, but I am not a hater either. You know what would impress me from someone to talk about someone other than Trump for just 5 seconds. I don’t believe for a second every senator or rep is clean, yet we hear nothing about anyone else but the president. I’d argue that the reps and senate affect your and my lives more yet crickets.

 

Matt thanked me for the blog and putting myself out there and was so genuine. I actually didn’t sleep much lol. The next day I spoke to my buddy Joe and my friend Jim Price from the Tigers network and I’m sure Matt gets so much of that every day it didn’t matter much to him. Regardless I shouldn’t have been an asshole.

 

Speaking of Jim we had what feels like our yearly chat on the new baseball season. He sounded pretty rough so hoping he gets better soon. The Athletics this year are not going to have a radio station in the Bay Area so local fans can still hear a radio broadcast, but they have to do it online. Me being me I never listen to shit on a radio, but here is where it does bother me. If I were to go to a game the online thing doesn’t work, because you’re on a delay. The problem is some radio stations delay also so but at least as a blind person who goes to games frequently if the radio exists it means I may have a good time vs an awful boring time. Abby and I go to the local team here in Louisville and last year for most of the year the radio was behind the game so we just stopped going. It’s no fun if you’re so far behind everyone else. I can listen to the game that way just as easy in my underwear at home. People ask me why do I go to games? The real easy answer is I think it’s important to be out there networking and meeting people. I do so many things at home I just enjoy being out at a game smelling hotdogs and beer. It lifts my spirits in a way I can’t describe. So I agree with the philosophy, but the change scares me as a blind fan who loves to go to games. Good luck to Jim and Dan calling Tigers games this year!!

 

Alright I am heading back to bed now the Mac does what I set out to make it do god my poor wife the littlest thing makes me try to conquer it. Have a good Monday!

Filling out the Seeing-Eye application is leading to anxiety for me

Yesterday was the game of games. What a game actually not just because I picked the winner, but it had drama. Did you see the half time show? Don’t worry I didn’t see it either. Okay bad blind joke moving on. In all seriousness yesterday was a rough day for me. I love football, but I don’t watch it the same anymore as I used to. This year I watched more than I have in several years. It always makes me think of my friend Ethan. We would always talk football and he would have hated that I picked the Chiefs to win he hated the Chief fanbase. At the end I will post in a writing I made on my new Braille Display I am testing out for work.

 

I gave a speech to some second grade class rooms for a career day last week and this little girl reminded me of my favorite Super Bowl story. I was leaving the school holding on to a ladies elbow, and this little girl came up and asked if I was alright because I wasn’t looking around? I told her I was fine. I love little kids honestly I do the honesty they have is so sweet. Anyway she reminded me of my favorite story. Ethan, Whitney, and I went downtown Indy when the Super Bowl was being held there and took part in some fun. We met Ethans dad at a Buddy Guy concert. To set up the story I had left Robin my Guide at Ethans Mom’s, because I knew we were going somewhere loud and didn’t know what else we would encounter. I don’t think I had a cane just used sighted guide. Anyway we were walking back to the car and this guy goes man he is so drunk look how much he is focusing on going straight ahead! The guy never knew I was blind and it just struck me as funny. When you have nothing to grab your attention it is easy to forget to look around I do try especially when talking to people, but I do forget to do it when walking.

 

One other quick story on looking around. I was at the airport sitting at the gate waiting on my flight, and they have these back to back chairs. So I am sitting there then behind me I feel this ball rolling back and forth and I thought to myself what the hell? I realize it’s a child sitting behind me with there head pressed against the seat moving there head looking around. I forget what lead me to this conclusion, but I was like how neat I realized then how little movement I really do make lol.

 

I have been looking at the application for a new dog most of the weekend. I have it on the desktop, but I am finding myself having anxiety filling it out. Blind people are so hard on are own. I was out eating with some guys recently and one said Bob had 13 guide dogs in his life he must not have done something right? It just brought some emotion up for me that I think people often speak about something they know nothing about. I know Frasier not making it wasn’t my fault, but what if it happens again? Do people start saying things if they do how will I react? I’ll get there soon I think, but just keep opening and closing it for now. It really is unfair take a sighted person if they reck 4 cars does anyone ever go you know I think Bob shouldn’t drive anymore. Maybe someone should??

 

I wrote the following on my way in to work. I love writing it’s how I express myself, and just be honest. Suicide is something pretty hard for me. I remember reading things after Chester Benington died and it was awful what most folks say behind a keyboard, and I took what they said so literally because I was dealing with it personally. In my free time I joined a group online where I just try and listen to peoples issues and write encouraging things. No matter what you think someone will miss you, and the pain from that side I understand really well. I understand it though to the best I can. Parents shouldn’t have to lose a son or daughter, nor should a son or daughter have to lose a mother or father. Anyway I wrote the following and posted it last week, and 6 people reached out and said it changed there minds. It’s not a huge number by any means, but cool to know I did something good in a strangers life. I wrote a lot after Ethan died and most I will never show anyone, but this took some parts from that and other parts from just loss in general.

 

It’s been 5 years to the day you decided to take yourself away
The first year people reached out and we talked about all of the gray we see in life its not always black or white
It’s been a fight getting to sleep at night

Honestly without bourbon I’d stay awake  until daylight
I think of all the times you helped me get threw something tough in my life and I just never realized your pain and knowing now it just cuts me constantly but I can’t remove that knife

Finally I get to sleep I have this dream that I come in and talk you in to giving me your gun that no matter what’s going on will get through it and eventually get back to having fun
We even get to that point and I hear your laughter and its the greatest sound I’ve ever heard
I hug you and it’ feels so real
Then I wake up and it’s just me sweating in bed sad because all of that happiness was just in my head
….it was all fucking fake your still dead

It’s been 5 years to the day you decided to take yourself away
The first year people reached out and we talked about all of the gray but those people soon disappear they think I should only mourn for so long and move on
It’s been 5 years to the day you decided to take yourself away

Chorus could be something like
We always promise ourselves there will be a Tomorrow forgetting to easy that you can be lost by sorrow

Notes
Hated using fuck in the second part but at the same time I like the emotion It’s real. Maybe rethink it though and try to convey the message without using it.

This one belong’s to Denny

The subject line is taken from Reds Radio. Whenever the Reds win a game Marty says and this one belongs to the Reds. I thought it was fitting. I hate writing these sort of posts, because they take me so long to do, and stir up feelings and emotion. I was taking a break from Facebook do to it killing my battery and also just the annoyance of it. I find myself for the last few hours refreshing reading comments and thinking. Closure is hard to find on something so unexpected. To get to here let me start in the beginning.

When I moved to Muncie to attend Ball State I met Carlos. He invited me to his and his girlfriends house for a Christmas party. This guy named Denny was there talking about how he couldn’t order food from a website. Me being a smart ass I asked him what screenreader he was using and he said Jaws. I said that’s your first problem it works with Window-Eyes. Man we laughed about that comment for years. I don’t know why I said it, but it just came out. Denny and I would go on to talk for hours. Literally in college I would call him at 11 and we would end at 4 am. Blind people never sleep lol or at least it is a struggle.

Denny was a big baseball fan. Every baseball season during spring training we would pick who we thought would win the world Series and who would finish where in the division. I’m going to miss shooting the breeze. He was so excited about what the Reds were doing this offseason.

We started this tradition where he would come down and we’d watch opening day together. It started because one year the Reds played the Bats I think it was in 2013. Denny, Robin and I all went to the game. It had rained and was like 48, but the wind was blowing. The more we told the story the colder it was lol. Seriously though I froze, and Robin started shaking against my leg so I took off my jacket and put it around her. They played 7 innings and then called the game. I remember we’d get a pizza and sit and watch games. Usually we would watch the Cubs and Reds and than anything else that looked good. The last time he came down for opening day Abby made dinner for us. I think they had 3 games on a Sunday and then real opening day was Monday. I just remember the 3 of us sitting outside, because it was nice all playing dice world on are phones listening to the Yankees game talking about batters and anything else that came up.

I feel in life you meet a few people who help you become better as a person. For me not in any order it would be Carlos, Ethan, Phil, Steve, and Denny. Anyone of those guys I could talk for hours too and just be me. I had a lot of depression and anger I think looking back on it during my younger years and Denny helped me he understood. When I drank to much and had alcohol poisoning in college he understood and when I struggled with just being treated differently from piers he got it.

He was always a helpful guy. I was searching for an email for something unrelated and I found emails he had sent to me years ago. Some for assistance in switching screenreaders some just a link with hey we talked about this yesterday what do you think of this article? He also had a hearing impairment which he never really complained about. I always admired him for trying his best. Being blind and partially deaf had to be tough.

One time I met him and his daughter to see an art project she was working on. We were walking through the building and some lady said it’s cool you bring your son to these events. Not missing a beat Denny said I know thank you. From that moment on I’d randomly call him dad. He was about my dads age minus a few years so it worked. I think the last several times we talked he knew how much I loved him. Well I’d be proud to be his son, but I got to be won of his best friends so that is pretty cool.

Yesterday it was so pretty, and Abby and I went for a walk. I’ve been struggling to sleep lately my clock is screwed up again blind people suck at sleeping. I sleep when I don’t want to and can’t sleep when I do lol. Anyway after the Kentucky game I told Abby I was going to go sleep for a bit. About 11 she woke me up letting me know she had read Denny had died earlier in the day. It’s crazy I texted him about 8 this morning. It’s the funny thing about life is you just never know. Thankfully he didn’t suffer, but I talked to him recently. The Older I get the more I try to let people know you know what it was great hanging out or seeing you. I’m probably annoying or more emotional about it than I would normally be, but you never know when that last meeting will be. In my life as most I’d say I’ve had to say good-bye to early to friends to much it seems. Anyway I’m pretty emotionally tired of writing now. The funny thing is I just purchased a Jaws license Friday, and was going to tell Denny about it so he could have a good laugh. Thank you for all the memories, and I’m going to miss you my friend. Baseball won’t be the same without being able to call you, and complain about how they’re ruining the game. They don’t need clocks in baseball. Love you dad I hope this makes you proud.

I will leave you with one unrelated story. I got in a Lyft Friday to go to work, and the driver and I started chatting. He said last night at the women’s Louisville game the national anthem was so emotional. He said a blind kid about 8 years old belted out the anthem in all red in her Louisville gear. I said well I can’t believe her parents would lie to her she thought she had UK stuff on I’ll forgive her. He didn’t know what to say. Lol I love catching people off guard. On a side note the news reported that an 8 year old blind girl sang the anthem at the game. Why does the news have to put the fact she’s blind in the story? I haven’t heard her sing yet, but if it’s amazing then just let her be 8. I digress maybe one day.

Bose Frames helped me make a friend

I must first start off with I’m typing this on a new product. I’m using a Microsoft Surface Go. I know I praised the all mighty iPad before, but I’ve been playing with this thing for about a week, and I love it. I sold my pro on Ebay Friday. Microsoft has done a great job with making Windows accessible out of the box. I’m experiencing nostalgia with the Surface. I remember being in college lugging a heavy computer around that got hot on my legs while using it, and to feel this device and see it’s smaller than my iPad pro was is amazing. Apple really does need to figure out easier ways to share files and give you a file explorer. I feel like to simply get a file off of the device it would take one 10 minutes to figure out what programs the two of them had to get said file from one person to another. Apple folks are really sensitive though. A friend of mine says the processor sucks on the Surface go, and sure it isn’t a Cadillac, but this horse manure Apple feeds you each year is tiring. Is the new chip in the Pad impressive? Maybe. It’s running a mobile operating system enough said. The Surface is full Windows no comparison. When your pad can run MAC OS we can talk.

Is windows perfect hell no as a tablet d the Surface has a lot to be desired, but I like the fact it let’s me use Word and play some audio games the IOS devices don’t have. It is sad though as a blind person I’m playing 20-year-old games. Not because I want too, but not many new games are being made to play that are worth it.

I got these Bose Frames to play with and test. It’s crazy, but they have helped me make some friends. I’m a chatty fellow normally, but people often avoid me it feels like. For example, I have a bus driver I see every morning. He weirdly grabs my hand to show me where the ticket box is even though I do this task every day, but whatever I just hope he washes. Anyhow I always greet him good morning. He normally grunts at me. On the day I first had the frames on he said nice glasses! I said thank you and I’m going for a more vintage blind guy look. He laughs and says you have jokes. Something if he had spoken to me in the last 3 months he’d know already. Anyway, he continues to talk to me the entire trip to work. I pulled the bell for my stop, and he continued to talk as I exited. The glasses were cool, because I was able to check my GPS without him knowing. I also used them while sitting at church while Abby was practicing. I had them on watching You on Netflix, and 2 or 3 people walked by and had a brief conversation with me not knowing I had sunglasses that were playing music. I really did enjoy them, but they have a few flaws. The first is to turn them off you have to take them off and turn them upside down. Okay fine, but with only a 3-hour battery life you should give me a power button option. Also, my ears hurt or felt fatigue after using them. I did get in to a discussion with a friend of mine who is a doctor. He told me when giving lectures he wears his lab coat, because over the years he’s learned most don’t know how to identify when he isn’t. He said most folks are just used to seeing a blind person with sunglasses and when they don’t encounter what they have pictured it makes them nervous.

I mentioned earlier I sold my iPad well I got in to a conversation with the buyer where I mentioned I was blind. They wrote back saying that they were sorry that I was blind. I always feel weird when someone mentions this. Why are you sorry? You don’t even know one thing about me rather than somehow picturing the best they’re automatically sorry. For example just because your sighted doesn’t mean your living a wonderful life. Should I start asking about your financial situation or job? I just find it strange your first thought is to say your sorry.

I’m debating leaving Facebook soon. I keep going back and forth on it. On one hand I enjoy seeing new things about people. On the other hand I can’t stand the political shit. No matter who your for I miss the old Facebook where it seemed like I was being political. Lol seriously I learned your not going to change anyone’s mind, and rather than be upset or irritated I could just do away with it. I deleted the app from my phone, and magically my battery is doing better. Facebook never came up in apps that were using battery mainly because I never left it open, but it is pretty astonishing the difference deleting it has made. The other thing is the mobile website and the desktop website are frustratingly bad. For a website and app as popular to be so bad is astonishing. Most I’m sure view it on a phone or tablet and never actually see the full version. Here’s a word of advice don’t.

7 years in Kentucky Y’all better consider me a Kentuckian now!

It’s hard to believe 7 years ago I took a job at Humana moving from Muncie to Louisville. At the time I wanted to do move somewhere new with an airport, and bus station. I know my wants are so low. Seriously though it was a struggle to get transportation besides friends out of Muncie. I wanted to try and chase a dream of being in radio, and I needed those things to try and do that.

I’ve always been a sports fan, and grew up thinking I could be in the NBA. Then my mom told me I had two strikes against me. One I was blind and 2 I was white. Now trust me I think if I were black I could have played damn it. Anyway when I moved here I liked both teams. I always thought the Kentucky Wildcats had a much better radio play by play announcer, but regardless I kept neutral.

It was 4 years ago roughly that my life and views on the world and people changed. I got a call that Ethan had killed himself. It changed me in several ways I try to tell people I love them and what they mean to me now. You never know when that last time will be. I would just come home from work and sleep. Reading was about the only thing I could do that took the numbing away.

I then got in to a radio showed called Kentucky Sports Radio with Mat Jones. It’s about sports, but it usually is the ridiculous banner that comes up that makes me enjoy it. For the first time in a month or so I could laugh again. I started really [pulling more for Kentucky. I got in to the teams that year loving the roster of guys for both Football and Basketball. In many ways it brought some new normalcy back for me.

I still have a hard time with the NFL. That was something Ethan and I shared the passion for and would talk about. I try to watch, but it hurts and that enjoyment isn’t there. Life is funny that way we all take the little things way to much for granted. I remember thinking at one point in my life no woman would come between me and my sports. I loved sports so much then Ethan dies and it’s tough to get through a NFL game.

Tonight Kentucky ended a streak of 31 years losing to Florida. I went to the game 3 years ago at Commonwealth and we should have won that game. Abby went last year I’d just got home with Frasier and decided that would be two much for him. They should have won that game, but fell short. Abby and I both until the end thought we may lose this yet, but when they won oh man we were both so happy.

Then I had to hear what Matt and the other fans thought. It made me so happy listening to folks who’ve gone for 30 years to games and finally got to celebrate. That’s the thing I like about Mat’s show. Most radio and Tv is based out of New York or has a national appeal but when you listen to Mat’s show it’s folks from this state who just love there team.

Anyway I can’t believe it’s been 7 years since taking that leap of faith that things would work out. Robin and I learned downtown, and then got a house. Now I have a wife it’s crazy how I’m becoming part of this wonderful city and state. Anyway I wanted to reflect on things tonight and I realize how fortunate things have been for me. Wrapping up go Cats!!! Also miss you bro I think about you still every day. Give Robin a hug up there,, and I’ll see you on the otherside.

Christmas

The last 2 weeks have been rough. I’m learning to use my cane again, and I hate that. I feel like a pinball bouncing off of things. Even when Robin was here I used to go a few places with my cane where I know it would be hard for her like basketball games once I started having people to go with. When I would go before by myself I would take her to have company, and I could usually feel more comfortable with her there. When Abby and I go we usually take our canes and sit in the cheap seats, because we can see the same from the 200 dollar seats as the 20 dollar seats.
 
Abby and I did Christmas where I got her jewelry, and a Chicago Cubs hair scrunchy. I think I did well. She got me some QC 35’s which I love, an Amazon backpack which I was wanting to go back and forth with from my house to hers, and finally a wind chime for Robin. She wrote me this really neat peace she wrote from Robin’s prospective. I will put it in below. That made me tear up and really made my day.
 
I got her ashes back Friday. I was so happy to get them. The box she is in is beautiful. It has engraved flowers I can feel and it’s a solid nice piece of wood. She also is heavier than I expected. Somehow the paw print was lost I was a bit bummed, but just having her back cheered me up. I think the hardest part of death has been you realize we have little control of what actually happens. I had this fantasy that I would work Robin until next summer then I would retire her, and she’d be here a few more years. The reality obviously didn’t work out that way. Anyway here is what Abby wrote thank you babe for being there and being so creative. The part about Boston Blacky made my day I listen to an episode every night, and have done so since moving to Louisville it relaxes me.
 
Dear Daddy,
I am lightly waving my tail around as I write this for you, so excuse the errors if you find them. 
I wanted to tell you, that I had an amazing life as your dog. I mean, listen.! Who else gets to guide the most amazing dad around, get to know and love his big family, (Grandma was my favorite), and do anything and everything that I as a german shepherd couldn’t possibly ever think about. There was college, which I truly made my mark. I met your friends, took you to class even on those days when I thought we should stay in bed and cuddle, I met silly girls who always made a huge fuss over me, I think it was because I was so pretty, and countless other things. I guided you through uhuge places where they played baseball, (Wait, what is that thing called again?), oh.. baseball. That was always your favorite. However, I have to ask you a question. Why in the world did we ever go to see any type of ball game that would cause me to shiver? I mean seriously dad, My poor coat wasn’t even keeping me warm that day!! Brrrrrrr!!!!!! I do remember though, that you took me inside of your coat and lap and held me close so I could warm up enough to guide your happy cold drunk butt out to our ride later on that day.. Thank you so much!!! J
As time went on, you grew up some, and I so elegantly matured. My guiding skills got better and before I knew it, you were working a job that payed money that bought me food and toys. This made me so happy. I had endless amounts of food and I liked that. 
I hated those times you left me. I loved staying at Grandma’s house though. I made such a noise when she would enter my line of vision. Who cared how far away she was, but that lady just melted my heart… I even bit her once or twic. I couldn’t contain my excitement and plus, I forgot to close my mouth from smiling. So, that was the logical thing to do!!!!
Some years later, we moved to this place and I made more doggy friends and more human friends. We got into a pattern, work, parra transit, seeing one of your silly girlfriends, and then it was cuddle time! I loved cuddle time the best because I learned that in order to get your attention, I just had to flop into your arms and that always made you smile.
Eventually, I met this girl you said was my mommy. I loved her because she taught me how to eat candy. How come you never taught me to eat candy? Seriously daddy, it’s the most amazing thrill that my doggy mouth ever had!!! I loved it when I would sneak myself a piece when we were going home from Mommy’s. You told me to “drop it” and I didn’t ha ha ha ha ha! Can’t you just hear my inner laughter? I know I can.
Finally, I got really sick. I couldn’t eat, or drink much. My tummy hurt me so much, but I couldn’t nor did I want, to tell you this. I wanted to keep living for you, for us. I wanted to keep on going to work with you, and getting treats from your boss and laying under your desk, listening to you talk to the most annoying people ever. I loved it because while you were stressing out, I was off in doggy dreamland growling at other dogs who weren’t shepherds.
I tried my best to be the dog you wanted me to be and I know you loved me so much. This sickness that I now know was something called “cancer” hurt me, and you made it all better sometimes with medicine. However, I still hurt, so you sent me to live at rainbow bridge for a while. I am not mad at you daddy. You did the best you could. God says that where I am, you will be at some point. This kind of life that I shared with you is only temporary. I hate that word, temporary. Well, whatever that means, I’ll be waiting for you. 
Before I go for now, I wanted to leave you with a few doggy thoughts.
1. Don’t get to used to not having anyone to take out and feed. If you decide to get another “me” I will visit them and teach them your habbits.

2. Be happy. Don’t mourn for me long. Where I am, is a doggy’s paradise. I eat when I want, and eat what I want. Here, I have no pain, and my cancer is all gone. I run and play with other dogs, and I sleep in the softest bed ever. The god up here even puts on some Boston Blackie for me to go to sleep to.

3. Be good to yourself. You did what was best for me, and you gave me the best life I could have. You loved me unconditionally and for that, I thank you. Be kind to yourself because you did what was best for me. I am glad There is no pain anymore. 

4. Taking naps under trees is the most acceptable way to nap off a hangover.

Merry Christmas and happy holidays!

Sorry for the long wait but I was parking my car

I haven’t written in a long time. Let me get you up to speed where things are. Also Happy Thanksgiving y’all.
 
Abby and I have been together more than a year now. Every day we get closer, with us and the two dogs we have are little family. One of my favorite trips we did so far is we went to Lexington to watch a Cats basketball game together. It was last year and they were playing LSU. I’ve gone before but usually with someone sighted who would drive me. We caught the bus here in Louisville and got to Lexington. Once there we caught a Uber to the game. We left the dogs with Jerry and Lee because we didn’t have accessible seating and I didn’t want them to get stepped on.
 
The funniest thing happened in Lexington. After the game we waited for the usher to help us out to the front. In Louisville usually you get one person, but there they are mainly volunteers so you get handed from one person to another until you get to your destination. Once we were in the elevator heading out the guy asked us where we parked? We advised him we took Uber and would catch it in the front. We went to a restaurant that was a former church made in to a pasta place. The bar was actually where the preacher would have stood. Anyway when we were leaving a guy grabbed my hand and helped me down the stairs being over protecting making sure I wouldn’t fall. He then goes where did you guys park? In my head I’m thinking seriously you registered I was blind, but now you’re going to help me to my car to drive Abby home? No wonder are streets are so scary. We left dinner with a few hours to wait for the return bus to Louisville and we learned they lock the station so we went over to a Burger King. I called a Lyft to go to the bus station when time and the driver showed up but we couldn’t find him so I called him. I advised I and my girlfriend are blind and we couldn’t see him. He said what? I repeated I’m blind and can’t see him. You’re BLIND? He yelled it or had a weird sounding voice. I said yes sir he was really cool actually once we were in the car. It turns out the Burger king was about 500 feet from the bus station so I tipped him nicely for his troubles. Lexington was fun just watch out they think blind people can drive which when you think about it is I guess cool we can do anything else I guess.
 
Robin has had a rough year. I took her to the vet last weekend and she either has Irritable bowel disease or cancer of the intestine. If she has the cancer she has a year roughly to live. If it is the IBD then not so serious, but it is still so hard to watch her age. She has lost 16 pounds since last November which scares me. Now that it is getting colder I will wake up in the night and she will jump up on my bed and cuddle against my legs. I cherish every moment like this. One morning I had a hard time getting up and she raised her head up and gave me a lick on the cheek that got me moving it was like she was saying hey daddy stop being lazy. I have her on a new food that she is eating every ounce of so I’m hoping it will put some weight back on her. When I touch her back and go towards her tail it just makes me so sad to see how much she has thinned out. We still play but only certain times. She likes to get on my couch when I’m in the chair and she is 10 so I’m okay with that. We’ve been through so many battles together. Trying to get gigs on radio and TV going from city to city in the last year or so we’ve really settled down. I know she can’t travel and do the things we once did and I’m excepting that for her. We don’t do a lot of street crossing right now because my work isn’t in a walking friendly area so it works out that she still comes with me If that changes I will retire her. She has stayed home more than normal and she has begun chewing the hair off her legs the vet told me it’s a behavioral thing acting out because of changes so truthfully I know she would be right beside me if she could be. I’ll never forget we were crossing an alley when I lived downtown and she stopped and backed up suddenly, and that’s when I heard a car backing out. A second later and I would have been hit. When you are a team it is so rough and so hard to see them getting older. To some she is a dog, but for me it’s more than that we have this bond that I’ve never shared with anything else. Robin you’re the best and thanks for your years of work, and also thank you to the Seeing-Eye for matching us.
 
Next year on the docket is Abby would like to go to Chicago to see the World Series champs!!! Yes I can say that the Chicago Cubs!!!! I cannot believe they did it. It was a really emotional night my grandpa Hoyer got me in to the Cubs, and listening all those years baseball is unlike any other sport. I’m hoping to take Abby to Wrigley. This year we went to a lot of Bats games they were fun except one which the radio was on a delay so people are cheering and were 2 pitches behind. Thankfully they fixed it for the final game. I miss baseball already. Were also going to Tim McGraw and Faith Hill here in Louisville. Finally so far we have tickets to see Aaron Lewis in Feb which I am so excited for. I will try to write more things are just really busy.

One year later and other thoughts

A year ago I got news my friend Ethan committed suicide. The news completely rocked my world. The next few months I’d just wake up at 2 or 3 and just cry. I may have a dream about him hearing him and then wake up realizing he was still gone. When it first happened all I could do was read. About a month in I started listening to Mat Jones Kentucky Sports Radio podcast and when I could catch it live on the radio. Honestly go read the day after Kentucky lost to Wisconsin and you’ll see my heartbreak. Watching them was like this mask so to speak. I cope with these things by watching sports, because it’s the one thing that has always been there. I still really can’t watch the NFL much I am trying this year, because I know Ethan wouldn’t want me not to watch it’s just hard.
I’ve heard so many things talking with friends that try to help but most didn’t know him and most don’t understand suicide. I’ve heard things like I don’t know why people would do such a thing? That just pisses me off quite frankly, because your not in that persons shoes. To me actually doing it is probably a real courageous act. It might not be the best thing, but it takes guts. To be in that much pain and whatever. I stopped talking about it around most, because I didn’t want to hear there ignorance.
I don’t wake up crying anymore, but I do think about him and wish he could still be here. I think about texting him about a Colts trade, or to laugh about something that would have been an inside joke and then let my phone fall back down.
Saying goodbye was the hardest for me. I remember the funeral seemed like a dream I couldn’t get awake from. You never picture saying goodbye to your best friend when he was 27. You never think this will be the last time we texted or talked. I cherish every memory I have of him, and I lost someone who no matter what I could count on if I needed something.
I wrote a memory about him, and it pained me to do so. I didn’t think it would be hard to share something, but I found it hard to focus on one thing or one instant. Here I share pretty personal feelings, but even now I am holding back a bit. I think about him every day, and I don’t think that will change. He always included me which I found special looking back a lot of people don’t so yeah.
I was going to write 2 posts, but I feel like shit. My throat hurts and my head is aching. Small problems I know. This weekend I went to the Kentucky game with Robin. When I got there the seat I had bought wasn’t big enough for her to fit down in between. I panicked because I requested special for accessible seating. They told me everything was sold out, but they had room in a box. I got up there and it was amazing. They had free hotdogs and soda. It had it’s own bathroom, and about 18 other people who knew I didn’t belong. No one really talked to me so that was a bummer. I did meat Rodger the concession guy we talked most of the night. On one play in particular I tossed my radio in front of me a little hard and it flew in to the wall. This lady came over and said here I think this is yours? I said thank you and couldn’t think of a disability I could claim to blame it on. The radio still worked Tom came over it just fine. Kentucky’s quarterback completed 8 passes the entire game and yet they still had a shot to win on the last drive. Overall I enjoyed the box, but I missed being in the noise. There were windows, but not quite the same.
Finally I will talk about this girl I met named Abby. We’ve been hanging out the last few weeks, and things are going really well. With her things are just really chill. I mean like I’ve always felt like I’’ve put in work and the other half has come up short or taken advantage of my kindness. I really like joking with her, and I’m excited to see where things go. I am taking things one day at a time, but I really enjoy spending time with her. She actually watched the entire football game and is catching on really quickly. I am planning on taking her to Lexington to watch a basketball game this year she loves the basketball team. The bus I took this time was real smooth and I was able to connect with a bus in Lexington that got me to the stadium.
I might as well say this now I had a job interview in Nebraska but thankfully I didn’t get the job. It would have been working with blind people something I want to do again soon. I just couldn’t imagine leaving Louisville and my home. The older I get the less diserable that becomes. I was freaking about everything moving Robin again, learning a new city, and what the hell to do with my house? Things work out though.
Before I go I just wanted to say hold those close to you tight. Even if you fight say I love you and hug them more, because you never know when the last time will be. I got let down by the Colts and Packers exit last year, but if the Cubs win the world series this year I know you played the best card up there sir. I’ll never replace him there will always be a spot for him no matter how many years pass. I loved the person he was and the prints left by him. I’ll see him again one day, and he can by me drinks pretending there from women to get me drunk and feel better about myself. I miss you buddy.