Diarrhea of the pin

i’m taking my radio to the ballpark to listen to Larry AndersonThe past two days I’ve been having difficulty sleeping. The first night I thought it was due to Erica being here and energy of the city, but she’s not here right now so obviously that’s not the issue. I found myself listening to guys that I idolize growing up in radio. Some of the clips I found on YouTube brought back a lot of painful memories of growing up in the country with no transportation, and wondering what it would be like to live in a big city what you get around. Some clips made me cry because I generally miss hearing those guys. I miss Santo, skip Carrie, and Harry Kalice. I was thinking about Harry this morning since I’m getting ready to go to Philadelphia.

I remember being in college and coming home in the afternoon to catch a baseball game and when I turned on the radio I heard something different. Scott and Larry the Phillies announcers were calling the game but crying throughout it. I remember listening to the entire game and thinking to myself that had to be the hardest broadcast they’ve ever done. I found a little bit of the pregame on YouTube, and just the memory of it brought me back to that day when I listened to it live. I’ve often heard people tell me that I bet you like Radio more than television because of the fact you can’t see it, but I don’t think that’s true. Rather I like radio, especially with baseball because it moves at a pace where the broadcaster becomes a part of your life. These days corporate sponsorship has taken over they can’t go five words without bringing up a company, or hearing the phrase here’s your Taco Bell crunch of the game. Regardless though at times of my life when going through tough times being blind or well that’s pretty much it. Haha baseball in the broadcasters have been there but I think that’s why it means so much to me that it’s hard to walk away from. This is the first weekend in a few months where I’ve pushed being awake so long, and since Erica has been in my life I’ve been sleeping seven-hour nights which is very unusual for me. I work hard and reach out and contact several radio shows to see about purchasing scripts or comedy or anything to get my name known.

For me Ron Santo was a tough loss as a fan. I saw him as a role model because he had diabetes that he played with as a player, he lost two legs but still made it to every Cubs game! It’s often times immolated now but he was a true fan and he brought that to the broadcast booth. You could tell days he didn’t feel good, but he still was there. After my grandpa died I remember listening to a Cubs game and Ron’s voice would just lift me up.

For me I’m humbled to have been able to hear these guys and many more that I didn’t write about. I think to myself that I might be weird loving broadcasters so much but baseball is a long season. I have to say things of been pretty fortunate for me that I’ve been able to come to New York see Sirius’s studios and last time I was here I saw z100 which is an iconic station in New York. I went to church recently with Erica, because she asked me to go and I enjoyed myself. Not necessarily because of finding Jesus or anything but I found an hour of peace where I can examine myself and think clearly. I’ll never be able to be that religious guy, but the way that some people view religion is how I view radio. Not that Opie and Anthony or my Jesus, but sometimes hearing a baseball game will pick me up out of a bad place or listen to a segment in the morning before work of Opie and Anthony will make me feel better about that day. I remember in college I started using recreational drugs is how ill put it here. I remember one night I went out drinking and then I came back to the dorm my minds foggy after that but I woke up with a bag in my pocket and $40 missing from my bank account. I remember going on a car ride with people I didn’t know and putting so much trust in them which was stupid. I remember listening to Kidd Chris and he was going off about why you shouldn’t do drugs or why he never did them and it touched me. For me that was the deciding point to stop so I did the biggest thing I saw was people who were doing drugs were weird. I would be at parties with these guys who were not going anywhere in life let’s just say and I didn’t want to go down that road. I do remember turning the church as well and trying to get more involved, but kind of like here I just never felt like I fit in. The day I woke up with the bag in my pocket I didn’t make it out of bed until around two and my parents came into town and I felt just embarrassed for myself. I don’t understand how I can start talking about baseball announcers and I get into talking about that? I have diarrhea of the pin. I guess finishing this off at the time in college when I was a freshman or sophomore a lot of girls would treat me differently they would be distant. It’s kind of been that way most of my life I also just broken up with a girl probably there usually to blame like Jimmy Buffett says. When I would smoke I would get lost and feel part of a crowd it took the edge off. It wasn’t real except for the stoners thought I was cool because they were smoking with the blind guy. I guess one final story on that my friend who I will leave nameless and I went to his house and smoke out of a Pepsi bottle he cut up. We drove to Taco Bell and then he dropped me off away from my dorm because there were police around and it snowed and I got lost. So here IM high as hell lost with Taco Bell in my hand. All I knew was that somewhere there were police. I called my other friend who is working and he came and got me I remember going upstairs and going into my room and I got freaked out because in my brain there was like a weird flash. I didn’t forget it because I really felt the sensation of something I’ve never felt before. I said that I saw something but I don’t think that was it because I have fake eyes eyes, but just maybe it triggered something in my head I don’t really know if that makes any sense but it was enough for me to quit. It really freaked me out! I think I’ll end the post here.

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